


The Dispute

by Cahaya (Tarlaith)



Series: Off-Road Conversations [4]
Category: The Magnificent Seven (2016)
Genre: Billy - master of bad puns, Billy is a softie, Billy wins an argument, Discussion, Fluff, M/M, baby bird, but he still wins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-23 22:42:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10728771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlaith/pseuds/Cahaya
Summary: “Back already? How was your bath?”“Billy, why do you have a cotton ball on your head? … OH MY GOD IT HAS A FACE!”“It's a he.”





	The Dispute

“Back already? How was your bath?”

“Billy, why do you have a cotton ball on your head? … OH MY GOD IT HAS A FACE!”

“It's a _he_.”

“It's an OWL!”

“An owlet. His name is Miso.”

“You gave it a name?!”

“Your horse's name is Adelaide, what's your point?”

“Kill it!”

“No.”

“YES! It's a cold blooded killer!”

“He's a baby!”

“A cold blooded _baby_ killer! Just look at those abnormally huge black soulless eyes! It's staring at me and contemplating how to best rip my heart out, that little hellspawn!”

“You're scaring him.”

“Just one second of inattention and it's gonna suck the soul right outta you like the doters do with eggs! SLURPING!”

“Now you're scaring me, too.”

“Main course today: Rocks and Robicheaux, blue-eyed travelers. But I'm not on the menu, not a chance!”

“Blue.”

“ _Figure of speech_ , Billy. Now give me a knife!”

“No. If I'd known you'd react like this, I'd have waited until _after_ dessert to tell you.”

“Then I'll get it myself!”

“Don't you want to know what I've planned for dessert? I took special care. It's just for us.”

“I'm not falling for that again.”

“All of me...”

“I'm really not. Stop looking at me like that!”

“... all over you.”

“... um.”

“Are you intrigued?”

“It's not as enticing with that thing staring at me.”

“There's no pleasing some people.”

“Throw it away.”

“He's sick. We'll only keep him until he's strong again.”

“We're _not_ keeping it. Over my dead body.”

“He didn't mean it like that, Miso. No, he didn't.”

“The hell I did! You know how I feel about owls!”

“You hate them because they're as shy as you. You never know how to start a conversation.”

“Excuse me?”

“Hand me the bowl.”

“Are those worms?”

“They can't hurt you, they're dead.”

“I know that! Do owls even eat worms?”

“He'll get a mouse later. This is just a wormup.”

“... you know I can see you trying not to laugh, right?”

“You're just too funny when you're ruffling your feathers like that.”

“I hope you're still laughing when that thing scratches our eyes out.”

“... I can't throw him back into the woods, Goody. He's too small. He'd die.”

“You don't usually care about that.”

“...”

“...okay, fine. But it's not sleeping in the bedrolls.”

“He can sleep in mine.”

“And where are you going to sleep?”

“With Miso?”

“No way in hell. I'm not risking that.”

“But he's so small and all alone in a strange place. He needs warmth and someone to care for him!”

“Next town, you can get him a basket and blanket of his own. Don't beam at me like that. One day your bleeding heart for all things wild will drive you into bankruptcy. And for now, you can share my bedroll. It's comfier.”

“Goody... are you asking me to _build a nest_ with you?”

“If you keep that up, I'm kicking both of you out.”

“We both know your bark is far worse than your beak.”

“Billy, stop playing fowl.”

“You're grinning.”

“You too... What does 'Miso' mean?”

“Smile.”

**Author's Note:**

> At first, the little owlie's name was supposed to be "Agma" (= Demon). Just imagine Goody's face! X'D
> 
> Thanks to Trinculo for proofreading (again).  
> Thank you for reading! :)


End file.
